Losing All Control
by Lazoey
Summary: Rose has just told Donna that she will die in three weeks time. This is my spin-off from the "Turn Left" episode. Donna can't cope with all this information and feels alone and heart-broken. However, so does Rose.


"Three weeks time. But you've got to be certain. 'Cause when you come with me, Donna, I'm sorry, so sorry, but… you're going to die," Rose said as she stood looking into Donna's eyes.

Donna was trying to keep her composure. She didn't want to break down.

Not now; not in front of Rose.

But even as she tried to concentrate, a tear fell down her cheek. Her eyes watered so much her vision became blurry. She couldn't contain her emotions anymore. She began to sob as she placed both hands on her face and collapsed to her knees.

Rose rushed over and kneeled down in front of her. Donna couldn't stop sobbing into her hands. All that happened to her life within these past few months had seemed to drain her life away.

She was nothing. She had nothing. She had no one.

Rose placed a hand on her shoulder, "Donna, I know all this comes as a shock to you."

Rose started rubbing Donna's shoulder, trying to comfort her, but she couldn't stop crying. Her emotions were like a waterfall now; all coming at once. She gasped for breath as she continued to sob. Rose couldn't stand seeing Donna like this. All that she had known of this woman was how brave and strong-willed she was, but now all Rose could see was someone who was vulnerable and alone. She gently grasped Donna's hands from her face.

Her eyes were reddened and they looked so tired; tired, afraid, and hopeless.

Rose moved Donna's hair away from her face, as she placed one hand on her cheek gently brushing away the falling tears with her thumb. Donna turned her face away, not wanting to look at Rose. She felt ashamed and embarrassed. She was never the one to break down in front of others. She always had control over herself and yet now she felt all that control slipping.

"I'm sorry," Donna said with a crack in her voice as she wiped her coat sleeve on her face, still looking away from Rose.

"No don't be sorry. I should be the one who's sorry," Rose replied as she took both of Donna's hands in hers.

"I'm telling you all these things and yet expect you to just go along with them like they have some truth," Rose stated as she held Donna's hands tight, "You don't know me. I'm the stranger to you."

Donna looked down at Rose's hands grasping her own. She still felt too ashamed to look at her face to face.

"But I'm not a stranger to you?" Donna asked, trying to swallow the lump in her throat.

"No, you're not," Rose replied while gently rubbing her thumbs over Donna's hands.

"But how is that possible?" asked Donna, looking down at their hands and shaking her head in confusion.

Rose looked down trying to find the words to explain what was going on in Donna's life. If only Donna could see how brilliant of a woman she was. If only she knew of the adventures she had and how her life did matter. Rose couldn't come up with any logical explanation.

All she could say was, "Do you trust me?"

This made Donna's gaze look up and into Rose's eyes. Her eyes were sparkling in the moonlight, longing to know the answer to the question she asked. Donna wasn't sure why, but she most certainly trusted Rose a great deal. Far more then she had trusted anyone in so long. In that moment, she didn't feel alone anymore. In that moment, she felt life breathing back into her.

"Yes," was all Donna could let out as a reply; it was barely a whisper.

Rose gave her a little smile and placed her hand on Donna's cheek wiping away the last tear that fell. Donna couldn't help, but give her a half-smile back.

"Now let's clean yourself up shall we?" Rose said with a little spunk in her voice as she lifted Donna up onto her feet.

Donna wiped her face with her coat sleeve and Rose began fixing her hair. She pushed Donna's fiery red locks behind her ears and gently rushed her fingers through it. Donna couldn't help but admire Rose at the moment. Even after seeing Donna break down, Rose still showed so much strength.

Yet, Donna could tell Rose was hiding something. In Rose's gaze, Donna saw longing; longing for something she couldn't reach. She knew this look cause she had it herself. She had been feeling the need for something more in her life; something or someone.

"There then, that's better," Rose said after fixing Donna's hair and giving her a smile.

"I really do though," Donna stated hesitantly wanting to really say how she felt, "Trust you, that is."

Rose took Donna's hands in hers and said, "And I you."

They stared into each others' eyes. They both felt the same thing. They felt needed; needed by each other. In that moment, Donna grabbed Rose's face and their lips touched. Donna had lost all of her control again and yet, she didn't care. This woman in front of her was all she cared about. Rose accepted the kiss and placed her arms around Donna's neck, as Donna's hands slid down to Rose's waist.

Both of these women were caught up in the moment and it felt so good. They were both similar in so many ways, but didn't realize it until now. The feeling of loneliness and heartbreak that was hidden away by their overbearing attitude was seen in them both. Yet even after everything they had each been through, they still had bravery deep inside, and tonight they both saw that in each other.

Donna suddenly broke off the kiss, in shock of what she had just done. She wasn't quite sure if she did the right thing. She backed away from Rose and her eyes began to water again. She wanted to say something, but she had a loss for words. She turned around and began to walk away until she felt Rose grasp her arm.

"Wait don't go," Rose pleaded as Donna turned to look at her, "Please."

Rose didn't want her to leave. Not now; not yet. She embraced Donna in a hug so warm and so loving, that Donna sighed in relief; relief of what they had just shared with each other was mutually felt.

"Now Donna, I stand by what I said before. In three weeks time, you'll come with me. You'll come to die," Rose said as they broke off the hug but still held onto each other's arms.

Donna looked down and shook her head still in confusion by how she could just walk to her death like that; so willingly, so open.

Rose put her finger under Donna's chin and lifted it up to see Donna's eyes.

"I promise you, the Doctor needs you this time," Rose reassured her with a whisper, "I need you."

And with that, Rose had vanished into thin air. She was gone. Donna stood still in disbelief of what had just happened; what she had just heard. This Doctor, Rose spoke of seemed like a myth; someone from a fairytale. But, so did Rose. This woman who had kept appearing in Donna's life telling her stories and then vanishing. Was everything Donna felt about this woman all in her mind? Was she losing herself? Only time would tell because in three weeks Donna would make her decision.

She would walk to her death, her destiny; not only for this Doctor, but for Rose.

Her Rose.


End file.
